Letting some of it trickle out while trying to soak it all in

Sunday, November 13, 2011

The last cutting board

"Oh No!" she screamed from the kitchen. I jumped up from the couch and saw Rachel facing the counter by the microwave, hands to her face, something dark red on the counter next to her. After ruling out finger severage, my second thought was that the bottle of carbonated cherry juice we'd set outside the front door in the snow to cool had exploded. Once I was at the counter I saw that it was the skin of the red onion I'd just cut for our salad.

"This was the last cutting board that was onion and garlic free!"
"I'm really sorry honey, I'll wash it off right now."
"Once a wooden board is contaminated it's permanently ruined."
"I knew we had a system but I figured this one was safe because you were cutting potatoes on it."
"No, the non-groove side of the smaller wooden cutting board is the fruit and bread board!"
"I am really sorry honey. . ."
"I just hated as a kid when the banana bread or watermelon tasted like onion because my Mom would cut it on a contaminated board. She said you couldn't taste it but I always could."
"Let me see if I can get the taste out."
"I'll just have to get a new expensive one at Alaska Bowl Company."
"Don't be mad Rachel, I know you've wanted a board from there for a while but don't get back at me by spending money frivolously."
"Holy Cow!" Ingrid piped up from the table. Rachel and I cracked up at Ingrid's new phrase and walked over to the table (onion crisis temporarily forgotten).
"Who did you hear say that?"
"Grandma Susan."

"Oh no!" Rachel's grabbed her head a second time. "You have to put a plate under that bottle of dressing, it has already made eight spots on the table!" I quickly snatched up the oily bottle of homemade vinaigrette while Rachel grabbed a plate.
 "Bummer." Ingrid said with sage disappointment in her voice. We were laughing too hard to ask her where she learned that one. For the record, the red onion and the salad dressing were my only contributions to tonight's dinner.

After dinner we walked to the mailbox to send some of Ingrid's water colors. Ingrid stuffed her dolly, a flamingo, a stuffed king crab, and that weird dog with bunny ears into her backpack for the walk.
Thanks to the Blacks for the bird and dog. Thanks to the Lights for the crab.


  1. Hey, I saw the link you posted on Facebook and had to check out your blog. Your daughter is so cute! And I love the name of your blog, too.

    -Michelle Dodge (from Urinetown times.) :)

  2. Yo Chelle dawg. Great to hear from you! I think Ingrid is cute too. What are you up to now?

  3. Your house looks like the north pole already. Boise will not look like that even once this winter.

  4. It goes from summer to winter here decisively and with alacrity. It is -30F right now. I've got a frostbitten Adam's Apple from the ride home.

  5. Not sure what Eve will say about the frostbitten Adam's apple. Or was that not a metaphor?